This is definitely a YMMV kind of story, John. I expect at least one "OMG you bastard you can't let alcoholics drink you scumbag!" response (probably from someone I don't know). And for most alcoholics, they are entirely correct.

But in this case, my friend gave their old partner permission to not be miserable in the few (very few, as it turned out) days that were left.

I thought about including this somewhat redacted quote from my friend:

One was when, in the last year of [my former partner's] life, I told her it was okay for her to stop trying to get sober. The guilt of constant relapses was eating her alive and destroying whatever quality of life she had left. At that point, she was dying. She knew it and everyone around her knew it. And still, they all kept haranguing her about the booze. She was ashamed and afraid. I didn’t want her to die feeling that way. So in one of our last very heartfelt conversations, I gave her permission to drink – to call me drunk if that’s what she needed and wanted to do. I just wanted her to know that there was someone who would love her despite her disease and the behaviors it manifested. Someone who could love her as she was, powerless before alcoholism and all. It wasn’t her fault. I think the permission to just “be [her name]” made it easier for her to pass gently and I’m proud of having given her that freedom.