Okay, Annie (and Dennett) — I most solemnly promise I will not electrocute any squirrels (not that I did anyway, because Deb shut me down before I even picked out the kind of wire I’d use) or chipmunks (who are new on my fecal roster, having decided it’s perfectly fine to leave little open holes and dirt piles all over everywhere, unlike the squirrels, who at least put the dirt back in the holes when they’re done digging up my bulbs and planting them three feet away LIKE WHO DO YOU THINK YOU’RE FOOLING SKIPPY… anyway), and I will not trap and kill any cute little mouses (I’m leaving catch and release as an option) or Gary (the garter snake in our garage, who was happy and content until yesterday when Deb spotted him and I may have accidentally revealed that I’d seen Gary before in that corner which turns out to be Not Good because now Deb is freaking out about Gary and I may have to learn to back the car into the garage so that Deb can get out on the safe side that doesn’t have Gary and so that she doesn’t crack open her car door and announce “I’M GETTING OUT NOW” so that she doesn’t step on Gary although I haven’t told her yet that I’m pretty sure garter snakes are deaf but I think I’ve probably shared enough information with her for now). Will that work?

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Husband & retiree. Developer, tech writer, & IT geek. I fill what’s empty, empty what’s full, and scratch where it itches. Occasionally do weird & goofy things.

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