Excellent educational post for males, Ellie. Even those of us who like to congratulate ourselves on how empathic we are to our female partners’ gynecological woes need to be reminded that This Shit Ain’t Fun.

My wife had an ultrasound recently. She’s post-menopausal, but her mom died of aggressive uterine cancer last year, so she and her doctor thought a baseline of Deb’s plumbing was a good idea. And hey, ultrasounds, they’re simple, people on TV get them all the time, they put a paddle on the lower belly and look at the squiggly black & white image. So I take her to get scanned, wait in the lobby like a good hubby, in and out, negative results delivered right there, yah team. We get in the car to head home.

DEB: Glad THAT’S over!

ME: (not expecting that amount of relief) I’m sorry, honey, I thought you weren’t that worried about showing cancer.

DEB: (giving me a “men are morons” look) You know there are two kinds of ultrasound, right?

ME: Uh… (yes, kind of, but only since some states made transvaginal ultrasounds an abortion prerequisite) So this was —

DEB: — the other kind. Yes.

The rest of the trip home was a tad quiet.

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Husband & retiree. Developer, tech writer, & IT geek. I fill what’s empty, empty what’s full, and scratch where it itches. Occasionally do weird & goofy things.

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