Conversation with My Wife (15)
I’m on Facebook. (Shut up. It’s how we keep track of family. Don’t judge.) My ex-wife’s sister (yes, very extended family, what about it?) challenged me to a Five Day Gratitude Challenge, where five days in a row I had to post three (3) things for which I was grateful.
Things were going well until Day 4. I had a draft with a nice, fairly innocent (IMHO) account of things I appreciated about my wife in bed.
ME: “How does this sound, honey: ‘I’m grateful for my bedmate, who doesn’t mind my snoring — ’”
DEB: “You don’t snore that much, honey. Mostly.’”
ME: “‘ — as opposed to a nameless person who used to whack me in the head with her elbow when my snores drove her crazy. And for a bedmate who likes to [REDACTED]
DEB: “You can’t post that, Jackster.”
ME: “How about when we — ”
ME: “Lots of people do it.”
DEB: “Lots of people do lots of things. They don’t post them on Facebook.”
ME: “Actually, if you look — ”
DEB: “WE don’t post them on Facebook!”
So the final version was:
I’m grateful for my bedmate. I have my reasons.