Conversation with My Wife (04)
Before my wife entered menopause, I assumed that “hot flashes” and “personal summers” were mental artifacts of hormonal imbalances — very “real” to the participant, of course, but not measurable by any objective observation.
The first time Deb got a hot flash where I was in a position to observe, in close and personal, we were snuggled on the couch. I thought she had gone nuclear. The air shimmered above her. Satellites tasked with mapping rogue IR signatures noted our geo coordinates.
ME: <mentally> (Oh my GAWD, woman, what the frak is HAPPENING to you?!)
ME: <in a very casual voice> “So… Hot flash?”
DEB: “Yep.” <pause> “Good thing it’s not a bad one.”
Meanwhile even I had started to sweat, since I felt like I was cuddling a 500W heater. (But a darling, wonderful heater! One that I love very much!)
Also, I would occasionally wake up at night to find myself fumbling for the control to turn down our electric blanket, which was never successful since we stopped using ours 15 years ago.
Just a word of caution to the appropriate males who might be reading this.